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Moving On

Thu, 17 May 2012 11:05:10 -0400

Thanks to all who have been supportive. It's time to keep the fond memories and the things that I have learned (both good and bad), close the door, and continue down my path into the future. Have a wonderful day.

Submissive

Thu, 17 May 2012 11:05:31 -0400

The last couple of days Master and i have been able to have wonderful talks and wonderful times together that is has brought my mind back to where it should be......

The mind where i know where and who i belong to and do not question things.... the mind that is at peace with who i am.....the mind that has given up her control to her Master and trusts him with no questions asked....

I have begun to learn alot more about Master and how his mind works and how he thinks and feels..... this i enjoy so much.. getting to know the inner workings of the person i so adore.....

I know with no doubt who my life belongs to and that is to you My Master......now and always and during this journey i am learning and growing within myself .... im learning to look outside the box and see all that is out there......for this i Thank You

I WILL BE A FRIEND TO YOU

Thu, 17 May 2012 10:05:48 -0400

If you need a friend,i will be here,if you need someone to listen and say nothing i will be here,if you need to VENT,SCREAM AND/OR CRY i will be here,if you need encoureagement,kindness,and some uplifting advice i will be here,if you need a hug i will give you one (((((((HUGS YOU)))))))))) if you need to share your thoughts,feelings,worries,concerns with someone who will understand i will be here

To me this is what a FRIEND is,and a FRIEND will always be supportive,and encouraging,caring and thoughtful,a FRIEND accepts you for who and what you are and will NEVER Try to change you,A FRIEND is a good listener when all you need is someone to not say a word but to really listen,and understand. A FRIEND is here when you feel alone and lonely and need someone to talk to,and a freind Loves You. I will be a FRIEND! to you and i will do all of the things i have listed above.i will NEVER hurt you,belittle you, make fun of you or make you feel unwanted. that is not who i am. i have a heart and empathy for others. i was a novice slave once and i know how difficult it was to find GOOD TRUE Friends so i have been there done that, and i will NEVER be That way with others.I Am more then happy to assist all i can and help if i can and i will NEVER IGNORE Your messages or comments,if i cannot reply right away you know i will when i come back. :-)) God Bless All Of You,And I Pray You All will find,Peace,Joy,Love AND happiness in your life :-))

ADVICE FOR A NEW SUB/SLAVE

Thu, 17 May 2012 08:05:59 -0400

What i want to discuss now is EMOTIONAL HARM where most physical harm will heal,emotional harm can last a life time. i have seen so very often where a sub/slave is harmed because he/she gives all their TRUST to one not WORTHY of it. Sub's/Slave's have several desires

1) A Desire to be owned

2) A Desire to please

3) A Desire to be Loved

4) And a Desire to be RESPECTED!

These desires can leave a sub/slave quite open to being harmed emotionally. These desires are VERY intense but they are very much a part of them,and it is important that a sub/slave understands these needs and how to have them met properly,and again this brings me back to TIME,PATIENCE,TOLERANCE AND UNDERSTANDING on the part of the Master/Mistress..For an ABUSER it is easy for them to become prey if the sub/slave does not understand. An ABUSER takes these desires and carefully uses them to harm the sub/slave,so my dearest sub's/slave's PLEASE!! UNDERSTAND YOURSELF,UNDERSTAND YOUR NEEDS, AND UNDERSTAND THAT WITH PATIENCE YOU WILL FIND WHAT IT IS YOU SEEK AND YOUR DESIRES WILL BE MET!

I am going to list things you should watch for and consider if these things are occurring,then PLEASE! Seriouosly think what is going on in your relationship.

1) ISOLATION

Are You On A Regular Basis Kept From Talking To Others? Be It A Chatroom,Phone,Or Any Other Venue?

Are You Not Allowed To Have Input From Others?

Are You Not Allowed To Talk To Your Friends?

Temporary separation from others does happen but it is only for a limited amount of time to give you time to consider things and learn but it is important to consider is this Guy Or Woman who claims to be a Dom/Master Domme/Mistress so insecure about Him/Herself and your relationship He/She cannot allow youo to talk to others?

A TRUE Dom/Master Domme/Mistress is not insecure and will not keep you from openly talking with others,so that you are secure in yourself and the relationship you are building with Him/Her

2) BELITTLEMENT

1) Do You Feel As If You Are Put Down?

2) Do You Feel Like Less Of A Person Than You Did Before You Met This Person?

3) Do Your Insecuritis Grow as You Have gotten More Involved With This Person?

A TRUE! Dom/Master Domme/Mistress desires to build up and to help make the sub/slave the BEST they can be,The sub/slave is a treeasure and will be treated with great Care And Love

3) TERROR

1) Are You Afraid To Speak Openly To The One Who Claims To Be A Dom/Master Domme/Mistress?

2) Afraid That Your Words Will Not Be RESPECTED?

3) Afraid You Will Be SCREAMED At Or Made To Feel Guilty For Expressing Yourself?

A TRUE! Dom/Master Domme/Mistress will NOT do that.You should feel safe and you need to know you have a RIGHT to express your concerns and that they will be listened to. A TRUE Dom/Master Domme/Mistress will talk with you,However,does this mean their view is right or yours is not? A TRUE Dom/Master Domme/Mistress will RESPECT you just as much as you RESPECT Them

4) LACK OF TRUST

1) Do You Feel A Lack of Trust for the one claiming to be a Dom/Master Domme/Mistress?

2) Are There Many Questions In Your Mind And Heart Which Cannot Be Answered?

In Any relationship questions do arise especially as two begin to learn about each other. A TRUE Dom/Master Domme/Mistress understands this and will allow you to express yourself. Their desire is that you have ABSOLUTE PEACE AND TRUST,First in yourself then in the relationship. You both are building a life together and you should feel SAFE and comfortable in that relationship,and if you start to feel unsafe for any reason at any time,then you need to go some place where it is SAFE You deserve to be HAPPY,RESPECTEED AND LOVED! And made to feel you are important and what you say counts. D/s and M/s is a partnership.You can't have one without the other!

SUBMISSION AND SLAVERY IS A LEARNING PROCESS

Thu, 17 May 2012 07:05:06 -0400

Submission and Slavery is a learning process.and is something a new sub/slave cannot comprehend or understand in a 24 hour period,it takes time to learn all they have to learn,but with the right Master/Mistress to help them every day that goes by the sub/slave will learn,understand and comprehend a little more,and no sub/slave is expected to learn everything in 24 hours,it just does not happen that way,and what they do learn they have to make sure they completely understand it before moving on to the next activity.

We all have our own ISSUES AND DEMONS we are not PERFECT! and if s sub/slave does have issues depending how complex or simple they are,if the issue is simple to fix such as being a HIGH MAINTENNCE sub/slave,there are tools that the sub/slave has available to them to help them turn that behavior around and become LOW MAINTENANCE sub/slave,and just because one is HIGH MAINTENANCE does not mean they are not a good sub/slave what it does mean is they need a GOOD,EXPERIENCED,KNOWLEDGEABLE Master/Mistress work with them to change that behavior,but the sub/slave should NEVER! be treated badly for that behavior or chastised for it.when a sub/slave is new they have to be taught and trained properly and a Master/Mistress Needs to have patience,tolerance,understanding and the ability to help their sub/slave be the BEST! they can be for themselves and the Master/Mistress.

A Good Master/Mistress builds up their sub/slave and helps them gain self confidence,self-esteem, and a good sence of who they are as a person and sub/slave not knock them down and degrade them,belittle them or make fun of them,if that is the case then you know the Master/Mistress are not GENUINE! And REAL! Everyone and i mean EVERYONE! deserves RESPECT! until they say or do something to change that.

A Master/Mistress cannot expect a new sub/slave to understand and comprehend their submission and slavery over night or say to them ''WHY CAN'T YOU REMEMBER WHAT I TAUGHT YOU YESTERDAY?'' some sub's/slave's catch on quickly and others need more time.So if you are a Master/Mistress and you expect Your sub/slave to learn a certain rule,ritual,command in 24 hours then you are going to be very DISAPPOINTED! because it won't happen. Your Responsibility as a Master/Mistress Is to make sure your sub/slave is trained and trained Properly and if you have to work with them on 1 order,rule,ritual or command for weeks then you do just that until your sub/slave completely understands,and comprehends that order,ritual,command and when they feel comfortable enough and believe they have learned it and shows you they have then you move on the next Rule,Ritual,Order or Command,And if you as a Master/Mistress Don't Have the time or want the time needed to train a sub/slave properly then you have no business owning one.

A New sub/slave needs guidence and direction and if you are to busy or to impatient with them to give them the time they need then maybe you should step back and ask yourself '' AM I REALLY READY FOR THIS TYPE OF COMMITMENT AND RESPONSIBILITY?'' if your answer is NO! then maybe it's time to put away your whip until you are ready.

If you train your sub/slave properly and is willing to invest the time and energy needed,you will Get results,you will see your sub/slave blossoming and becoming the sub/slave you want them to be,because all they want to do is please you and make you happy but if they do not have the proper training to do that and you don't have the time to teach them then do not blame them if they cannot perform to your standards.How can they serve YOU And Please YOU if they have no clue to to go about it?

If You really want a sub/slave to serve You to your specifications and to your satisifaction then it is your RESPONSIBLITLY! to train them to do so and that means TIME,PATIENCE,TOLERANCE,AND UNDERSTNDING and if you do not have any of these qualities then you are NEVER! going to have the sub/slave you desire.

My night

Wed, 16 May 2012 21:05:09 -0400

Today started out great with spending time with Master before he went to work (and yes Master im still sore) but as the day progressed i was not feeling good ... thank you antibiotics for screwing up my day ... they always seem to make me sick to my stomach.... but that will pass and also with no pain pills right now its been hard to handle everything....

I slept most of the afternoon away and got up about 6 knowing i had to eat something so made som pasta figured that wont upset my stomach .. so far so good

Tonight i got to spend some special tme with Master just talking about us and about things in our lives and changes we need to make in ourselves and how to handle things and it was just a wonderful time.... it was a time where it was just us and no one else around ... i love these times i have with him....made me dfinitely realize i am on the right path ...... i love you Master

Hanging on

Wed, 16 May 2012 20:05:55 -0400

Wednesday, May 15, 2012 7:45 PM I'm really frustrated right now, and feeling pretty down. It's not like I"m not clear about what I'm looking for in a dom from the start. I don't have five minutes of conversation with a dom without making it clear that I'm looking for a nonsexual relationship. Why the fuck is that so damn hard for everyone to comprehend? It's not fucking rocket science! I've told them. My husband knows that I'm submissive. I don't hide this from him. My agreement with him is that this be a nonsexual relationship. That includes things like no camming less than fully dressed, or controlling things like my orgasms. If you have more questions, please ask, but that gave you a pretty fucking good idea of what I can't do. This is not just about me, but about my marriage. Just because none of you fuckers has any integrity, please quit making it that the entire world is that way. *sighs* Okay, that was my frustration. I try to not judge other people. I try to accept them as they are. That doesn't mean that I use no discrimination, but I really try to accept people as they are. I was in a really good space on Monday. Finding a new friend and new places to hang out was a really good thing for me. I'm a bit discouraged with having not had that contact for a few days, but I'm trying to just relax and be patient. The thing with the dom today was a huge discouragement to me. I didn't go for my walk. I guess that one of the biggest things I need in a dom is for him to be willing to own his own shit. There are tons of people in the world who make mistakes, but it takes a special kind of courage for someone to admit when he is wrong, to step up and say, "That one was on me. I made a mistake, and I'm sorry." Like I said, I'm really frustrated with that right now. I'm really trying to not let myself sink back down again though. My "automatic" is to make it my fault, to interpret their actions as a reflection on me, that I am not worth them treating me decent. There is a part of me that still feels that way, but I'm really trying to not own that this time. It's really hard for me to hang on to though, when I have been looking for what feels like forever without finding that special person that I'm looking for. As much interaction as I have with people, it's surprising that I can be so incredibly lonely. A friend today made a comment about how needy I am. I know that it was not intended to be negative in any way, but it's always hard for me to hear it. I feel great shame that I need such constant attention. I feel like I'm faulty, defective, in need of repair.... broken..... except that I have no idea what kind of repair I'm in need of. One thing I do know.... I want so badly for someone to love me. I want someone to WANT to be with me. It sounds so incredibly stupid to me.... *sighs* Today I am content to just hang on to hope. It takes a lot to do that today, but I'm trying.

He didn't even yell

Wed, 16 May 2012 16:05:15 -0400

For reference's sake...Cartman is my husband. After Cartman had come home from his stress test...he had left a prescription at Kroger's and i was to pick it up...melipor or something like that...something to help alleviate the pain in his chest for now...or whatever lol... anyway...i'm coming back home...we have a two car garage but it's rather a tight fit...i'm driving the SUV as the miata is temporarily out of commission... Misjudged the turn into the garage for the first time in my life...banged the front bumper against the entrance to the garage... Sat there in stunned silence for what seemed like forever...went ahead and pulled all the way into the garage...dreaded stepping out... Hoping against hope that a miracle had occurred and that there wouldn't be a scratch or anything...am i that lucky? o hell no... The entire front left bumper that is above the headlight...the part that curves...is not the beautiful shade of blue...but scrapes of white white white...in a series of scrapes, scratches...all white... I enter the house in trepidation...not wanting to worry Cartman anymore than he obviously is...told him what happened in tears...yes tears...i said i thought that i only scraped off a bunch of paint... He went out to check...he said yup you bumped it hard...found a dent as well...but never once yelled...what a man i married... He has a buddy who can fix it...but it's not at the top of our priorities at present...however we've had this SUV since 05...brand new looking still...until this...sighs. .

Many Promises

Wed, 16 May 2012 15:05:29 -0400

Sometimes we fall for something that just isn't real. We believe people that we trust and yes, we can even fall in love. I've been a fool to believe someone I loved. I believed all the promises. I believed there was something real and I know now that what I loved was not real. The promises were just illusions...mind games...a seduction for the sake of another's amusement. I'm a little wiser and will be more careful with my trust and my heart.

DO I HAVE REFERENCES?

Wed, 16 May 2012 11:05:18 -0400

I Was emailed this question and it is a valid one

Q IF YOU DID SEEK ANOTHER MASTER DO YOU HAVE ANY REFERENCES TO PRESENT TO PROVE YOUR QUALIFICATIONS AS A SLAVE?

EXCELLENT! Question :-)) and my answer is yes and no. I will explian. I have been with Master_John as everyone knows here for 11 years.He is the only Master i have ever had,however if i were seeking another Master after GOD FORBID! Master Passes away. I Would get written statements from His Dominant friends who would verify my qualifications as a slave and also i would give Names,phone numbers,email addresses,everything a potential Master would need,and the documents would be signed by the Dominant who is giving me the reference and by myself,and the potential Master could contact these other Dominants.Unfortunately Master would not be able to because He would no longer be with me :-(( but i have other Dominants Male and Female who would give me a good reference because they know me well and have witnessed my devoted and loyal service and they would also explain my personality,attitude,experience and knowledge,They would be more then happy to assist me in my search if i ever did seek another Master. So YES! i could give good reliable references and NO! I could not get any from Master because He would no longer be with me,and that would be the only time i would ever search for another Master is when Master passes away,and i will not be seeking another Master,But i could present references if i was and all the information would be TRUE And HONEST! :-)) Thank You Sir_William For Your Question.I Appreciate Your Precious time,And please feel free to stop back here anytime,my door is always opened so to speak :-)) and i extend my sincerest RESPECT! To You and Your Sub/Slave :-))

A MOST SINCERE ''THANK YOU'' FROM A VERY SWEET SUBMISSIVE

Wed, 16 May 2012 09:05:31 -0400

I Was just given one of the nicest compliments that anyone could receive in this lifestyle and i am deeply touched by it. a very sweet male submissive just privately messaged me and told me that i would make a great DOMME! He said that because i do have experience and knowledge of this lifestyle and he thinks i am GENUINE by my blogs and that i would make a GREAT! Domme :-))

My response to that is i humbly and sincerely ''THANK YOU'' from the bottom of my heart,you have brought tears of appreciation to my eyes and a joy to my heart.Master has told me on several occasions i would make good SWITCH! and hearing that from Master is the highest compliment a slave could possibly receive from her Owner besides how pleased He is with my service and obedience,but hearing such a endearing compliment from a brother submissive in this lifestyle is overwhelming heart warming.and YES! honey i am GENUINE! in my slavery.i do know what i am doing and i can Also WALK HE WALK AND TALK THE TALK! and back up everything i say here.When i call Master at 1pm i have to tell Him of the most sincerest compliment i could ever receive from a brother submissive.THANK YOU'' My dearest submissive brother.your kind words and compliment have brought me joy and happiness to my heart and you have made my day a little more brighter.I Appreciate Your words of humility and RESPECT! Please do come back to my page you are always welcomed here dearest submissive,and please extend my sincerest RESPECT! to your Domme and please send Her my compliments because She has trained a very RESPECTFUL Kind,Thoughtful submissive And i am sure She is PROUD! of you.you represent Her well. May God Always Bless you and your Domme and may you and her live a long,happy life together. My humble and deepest THANK YOU. xoxoxo! :-))

A SLAVE IS NOT A DOORMAT

Wed, 16 May 2012 06:05:46 -0400

To actually say ''A SLAVE HAS NO RIGHTS'' IS Equivalent to saying ''A SLAVE MUST AT ALL TIMES BE OBEDIENT,EVEN IF THE OWNER ORDER'S OPPOSE SOMETHING THE SLAVE THINKS HE/SHE IS ENTITLED TO''.Seen this way the ''RIGHTS'' issue is an aspect of the larger meta-issue of OBEDIENCE! which i think is easier to discuss in particulars anyway. just because a slave is expected o be OBEDIENT to their Owner does not by any means of the imagination mean a slave becomes a MINDLESS ROBOT! i have discussed this issue before. A slave has opinions,creative ideas,input,desires and even temper tantrums and vocal demands for something he/she wants in their life. A slave can bring all those things to the table and more (and usually does in my case ) The only real difference beween a slave interacting with their Owner and any other relationship couple is the The Owner decides and has the final say and the slave does not question the final decision he/she just OBEYS!!

A Slave has a voice and often gets a vote.However,the slave does not get to make the final decision or question their Owner,which we presume is an agreement the couple is happy with since this is the dynamic they both consented to in their M/s relationship.

Owners have slaves because a slave provides something valuable in their life and that value extends far beyond simply having someone Throw out orders at you.Slaves are highly intelligent and responsible individuals who run a rang of activities from the menial to the highly skilled and/or creative.They run households,businesses,support and care take others and all of this on behalf of their Owner.I have NEVER! seen someone so lost as an Owner whose highly competent and effective slave is out of town on vacation or a business trip. Slaves are often DOMINANT in their own right.It takes a certain amount of self directed take charge attitude in order to effectively serve a DEMANDING OWNER! This is not a profile of a DOORMAT or a IRRESPONSIBLE AIR HEAD!

People who think slaves are these things do not grasp what a slave is or what a slave does in a M/s relationship. Slaves are STRONG! well educated individuals and are more then capable of taking care of their own life and affairs but choose not to do so. Being a slave is a personal choice just as being a submissive. Do you really think for one minute that a Master/Mistress wants to own a slave who is NOT Capable or intelligent enough to take care of all the responsibilities a slave has in his/her relationship?? ABSOLUTELY NOT! A Master/Mistress wants a competent capable,intelligent slave who can think for them selves but willing to hand over 100% of their life and control over to an Owner and A Slave who is STRONG enough to handle serving an Owner who is DEMANDING,STRICT And FIRM. You have to be STRONG,Physically,Mentally,And Emotionally to be a slave,But it is rewarding,fulfilling and satisifying for us who are slaves.This is our CHOICE! Our LIFE! Our HAPPINESS! And Our JOY!

Moving forward

Tue, 15 May 2012 20:05:18 -0400

As you may have noticed my name has changed. I have not posted the past few days, I've been going through a lot emotionally. I'm on my own again and that's okay, I will take what I've learned and keep moving on. I hope my former Mistress finds her happiness and I wish nothing but the best for her. I do love her but sometimes that's not enough. I openly admit that I have issues and I take full responsibility for my loss. I've started training to become certified as a Personal Care Home Staff Person, I like helping people, I feel this is a good career change and I have a job lined up once I'm certified. I will focus on the good things in my life, not the painful ones. Thanks to all who have sent encouraging thoughts.

Doing a Happy Dance

Tue, 15 May 2012 18:05:26 -0400

Finally got to see his smiling face for a few minutes lastnight I can't believe how excited I was to get to chat with him again. I feel a bit selfish at times though because I know he has to do his daily grind and has a life but I want to spend as much time as possible with him. STILL can't wait to get back in the states so I can actually cuddle this man. :) I have a feeling that stress and fears, will melt away in his arms, and in his eyes. I sooo need that someone that can take away the day with a single hug of course a freaken LONG hug lol. Funny though John seems to reply to me more often on yahoo now. guess he doesn't have to worry whether I 'm gonna ask him about the ticket or he doesn't have to feel guilty for not taking care of the ticket, when I tell him I'm taking my meds every other day nowdays to save money. He should feel guilty about that though its HIS fault but I can tell I shouldn't be doing it I feel "off"

WOULD I STILL BE SEARCHING FOR A MASTER IF I HAD NOT FOUND MASTER_JOHN?

Tue, 15 May 2012 17:05:13 -0400

This question was just emailed to me by a sweet slave and she gave me permission to use her screen_name so thank you slave_of_Sadistic_Master :-))

Q-WOULD YOU STILL BE SEEKING A MASTER IF YOU HAD NOT FOUND SIR_JOHN?

Great Question Honey,my answer is YES! even though it would be 11 years later,if i was still unowned and uncollared after all these years,i would still be seeking a Master,i would NEVER! Give up or Give in,I Would Be Past The Frustration Stage at this point but never enough to give up my search,but since i do not still have to search after all these years i am very happy.I Found my soulmae,the Love of my Life And The Master For Eternity And Beyond. Thank You Honey For Your Question And Please Feel Free To Come Back Anytime And Your Master Is Welcomed As Well,And Please Extend my sincerest Respect To Him.God Bless You And Your Master Honey :-))

i wanna say...

Tue, 15 May 2012 15:05:26 -0400

Any alternative lifestyle is difficult. It is my experience, we are either judged by mainstream vanilla peeps who have to apply their personal beliefs as to why our lifestyle is wrong, makes them uncomfortable, or is sick etc... OR By ones with in our own circle... who can be far more hurtful than outsiders. It is an everyday occurrence in our lives to be judged by people we do not know, people who do not understand or ignorant people with a sick need to just belittle another. It has become a norm to be laughed at for being bi, poly and an extroverted sexual deviant...even when all this drive is what our family has agreed upon. This situation saddens me greatly, is very disenchanting and causes me to pull more away from people and isolate myself from friends I may have trusted in the past for guidance because of how everything and everyone seems to have changed. A few years ago, when this was really really new to me, there where sisters, brothers and Dominants who became friends with words of kindness and advice. There where a lot of nice people here who touched me that i do not see much anymore, like I did, they tend to distance themselves. I was told by one very special submissive woman when I thanked her for advice after an all day vent session, and she said ever so sincerely "What kind of submissive would I be if I did not reach out to you, when I am in a position to assist you? It would be poor character and a disappointment to my master to do otherwise." & she also said "Your behavior directly reflects upon your Dominant, so choose your words, decisions and behavior wisely." Those comments she made to me stayed with me, till this day, and set a precedent of how i felt submission and support should be. It has guided my behavior on Masters site and in chat, effecting my behavior decision making and how i even operate at work. It all starts with basic respect...simple respect which so many vanilla and lifestyle people have forgotten. Am i perfect? Far from it, but i am able to accept redirection with grace and love if i find I have, in fact, lost my way. I am also proud of the person i see in the mirror when i wake up in the morning and I ensure my actions can not come back to bite me in the tush. A long time back, there were people on more than just this social platform that felt it was a duty and a kindness to help people, especially new subs and Doms alike to find their way. There used to be REAL support groups for new ones, or lost ones to reach out for a hand of support. There was NOT any sniping in local chat or in PMs. Two facing didn't appear the social circles i.e. CLIQUES, which are now so prominent, but even if you had a family, a clique, a circle, you still had a helping hand and not snide remarks or name calling or unnecessary judging & name calling. I think it is time we ask ourselves, how can we help and not hurt members and friends here. Encourage the growth and not the isolation of new members, reaching out and making them feel welcome and letting current members know they are wanted. Mean words follow you like a shadow of doom, but kind words will stay with your forever and I promise the smile will be returned. To the few that bark hate, know your words are heard by all, they hurt and they definitely affect how people perceive you.

Addendum: I have been asked *Do you speak of me, or who are you speaking of* I am not going to do that, if you have behaved badly you know who you are. if you have isolated someone... you know who you are, if you hurt someone say your sorry... It is that simple. If you do not like someone, block them and be done with it. Sniping is nothing more than insecurity in who YOU are.

Life changes

Tue, 15 May 2012 09:05:39 -0400

Sometimes there comes a time when you feel like your whole life is falling apart.... from your health to your attitude to everything and that is how i am feeling lately ....

I cant seem to put things together in perspective as they should be ... im just floating by and i cant reel myself in.... i know this will pass but i cant seem to get past this one....

All i know is i need to keep pushing on and doing what i need to do FOR ME..... to keep my head above water and to get back the feelings i had in me.. i know it will all fall into place but as i wander these halls aimlessly i hope i dont bump into too many closed doors and walls....

MY DAY OF CONSENSUAL SLAVERY

Tue, 15 May 2012 07:05:30 -0400

I would like to describe my day as a consensual slave so it will give you an idea what being a slave consists of,but please note the things i am ordered to do as a slave is not what every slave does in his/her daily life,i am just giving you some understanding about what i am required to on a daily basis,and basically my routine stays the same unless Master gives me different tasks. so,here is my daily life as a consensual slave. :-))

I get up anywhere between 4 and 5am daily monday'sunday no exceptions,no excuses. i am allowed ''FREE TIME'' in the mornings before i wake Master.After i get Master up,i start His shower,and i have all His shower supplies ready,Clean Wash Cloths body wash shampoo/conditioner ETC And Towels, i Also have His clothes laid out for Him on His bed.When the shower is Ready,I Disrobe Master and i proceed in the shower with Him. I am instructed to bathe Him ONLY! i am not allowed to make any SEXUAL ADVANCES toward Him what so ever or i will be PUNISHED SEVERELY! for DISOBEYING! a direct order i am not even allowed to Kiss Him.Bathe Him Only!

Once i have finished batheing Master i dry Him off,i am not allowed to shower until after he goes to work. i proceed to follow Master in the bedroom to dress Him completely.After i am done dressing Him Tells me to bring Him the morning Paper in His Den and prepare His breakfast and when it is done,to call for Him.I make Master's breakfast and His breakfast varies depending what He wants.after i have finished making His breakfast and coffee.i politely knock on the door of His den and respectfully tell Him His breakfast is ready. When Master is eating i clean up the bathroom,when He is finished eating,I clear the table and stand beside Him in the ''ATTENTION'' position eyes lowered not speaking unless told to do so.He commands a PARADE REST POSITION! and i immediately PARADE REST! my eyes still lowered and not speaking,He preceeds to tell me the chores He wants done by the time He arrives Home at 430pm,and i have orders to call Him Precisely at 1pm Again no excuses no exceptions 1pm no later and i am to give Master a report of how i am doing and how much of my chores i have finsihed.

After He Has Given Orders For The Day He Allows me to speak freely to Him and look Him directly in the eyes,We talk a little while then He says ''YOU MAY PASSIONATELY KISS ME NOW''! i smile and obey.Once Master leaves for work i start my daily chores and check back here when i have time.I call Master right at 1pm and give Him my report

When Master arrives home i am to kneel by the front door blindfolded and gagged (which i can do myself) Once He enters the house He greets me and orders me to rise,and He removs the blindfold and gag.He proceeds to look around the house to make sure it is cleaned to His specifications and it always is :-)) He smiles at me and says ''GOOD SLAVE,NOW PREPARE MY DINNER,I WILL BE RELAXING IN MY DEN'' and i reply ''YES MASTER RIGH AWAY'' so i prepare His dinner I am not allowed to eat until He is finished and i ask permission first.After dinner Master retires back into His Den for some ''QUIET TIME'' to Himself and when He wants me He will call to me

After about maybe an hour He calls to me and then He may want to use me,humiliate me,verbally Humiliate me and tease me,depending on His mood or i just may entertain Him.Around 9pm I ask Master if i may go to bed If He says Yes I Humbly Kneel Before Him Kiss His Feet Out Of LOVE,RESPECT AND HUMILITY! i tell Master how thankful i am to be His slave and to serve Him on a daily basis and how much i love and adore Him.then i may go to bed.this is my day as a consensual slave :-))

M/S RELATIONSHIP AND THE ''SLAVE'' WORD

Tue, 15 May 2012 05:05:54 -0400

Many,many people are involved in D/s of various degrees of control.Using the terms Master/Mistress and slave for the erotic charge and symbolic meaning of it Relatively in it's original and traditional sense of Owning a OBEIDNET HUMAN PROPERTY. Using the words Master/Mistress and slave in their literal sense or as close as it is possible to approach in this culture as i have no doubt made excessively clear by now,i generally use M/s in it's riginal sense.I Use the terms M/s ''LITERALLY'' and call everything else D/s.

M/s Relationships or more aptly called OWNER/PROPERTY RELATIONSHIPS have a set of unique attributes.and some of these are as follows:

An acknowledgemnt and awareness of the chattel nature of the relationship.Both Onwer and slave see the slave as HUMAN PROPERTY.This is not a figurative concept but a LITERAL one. Occasionally slaves are indeed sold in this sort of relationships at what are described as ''SLAVE AUTIONS'' and the slave in question,if they wish to remain a slave goes OBEDIENTLY (Perhaps happily/Perhaps Not to the new Owner)

The slave makes a choice to live in voluntary servitude and there after lives out a commitment of obedience. The Owner is the final decisin maker in all things except whatever He/She may have chosen to deligate to the slave as the slave's sphere of responsibility

Alot of people like to use the word ''SLAVE'' because it has erotic juice and that is where alot of confusion comes in,as if there were different styles of M/s relationships.In my analysis there is No different styles of M/s relationships if we are talking about the essential OWNER/PRPERTY Agreement.It is demonstrable that there are many different styles of D/s relationships,some which include the use of the term ''SLAVE'' and varying degrees of control.but there is only ONE kind of ''LITERAL'' M/s relationship.

The very meaning of those words reflects that this relationship includes an OWNER AND HIS/HER PROPERTY Completely OWNED Completely CONTROLLED HUMAN PROPERTY

I Also want to clarify that in OWNER/PROPERTY relationships can either have LOVE Involved or not.Many Owners DO NOT! Love their slaves,but care for them because The Owner took on that responsibility when He/SHE Decided to Collar the slave And the Owneralso cares for the slaves well being,and it is not uncommon for a slave to Love his/her Owner and that Love is not returned by The Master/Mistress.It all depends on the couple involved and what they disucssed and agreed upon before signing a Master/slave contract.

For people who are not 100% owned and collared property (as myself and others) but who are calling themselves ''SLAVES'' please be aware that you are using a term with a very specific meaning to the M/s sub set of our community,The ''SLAVE'' of a D/s relationship be it ever so controlling is not the same as the ''SLAVE'' of an M/s relationship.They are fundamentally different

Monday

Mon, 14 May 2012 19:05:25 -0400

Mowed the yard today, did laundry and did the dishes. Other than that nothing really going on. Going to Lawrence on thursday morning for my brother's wedding on saturday so. Not a whole lot to report today, a dull quiet day. i love You.